The art of non-comformity

I had never been to a book signing. It just never really occurred to me, and my previous opportunities had been limited. I also don't read all that many books, so combining a book I've read (or plan to read) with the author visiting nearby has been, to this point, relatively rare.

I received The Art of Non-Conformity as a gift and was supposed to wrap it myself for our tree, but instead I took

it to the signing. (I'm sure Aunt Sandra won't mind that I got the book signed. Maybe I'll wrap it before Christmas. Probably not.)

I've followed the author, Chris Guillebeau, for the past couple years. I've posted before about his online manifesto, A Brief Guide to World Domination, and his blog was my favorite of 2009.

The book signing event was fun. First off, it was at a bookstore in the University District, an area of Seattle we haven't visited yet. We keep finding these separate pockets of life in the city, and this one will be fun to explore in the future.

The event itself was bigger than I had expected. There were 100+ people there, and I ended up in Standing Room Only, leaning against Stieg Larsson novels with the others who showed up right at 7pm. The crowd was "varied"

in a Seattle way - mostly white, hip-looking vegetarians, but ranging in paleness and widely in age).

My take-home from the event was this: Trade efficiency for adventure. We tend to work very hard to increase our efficiency, but in doing so we often fill the created void with additional busyness and "soul-less" efforts. In my own life, I'm often looking for the most efficient way to complete my list of tasks, so I can then move on to my other list of tasks, complete that list, and then start on a new task. Guillebeau asks me to consider a new perspective altogether. I like being asked to do that.

The author has completed a 53-city tour to every state in the U.S., and he's heading to Canada in January. In our current social-networking-as-relationship world, and Chris's work as a blogger, a more obvious choice may have been an online campaign to support the book. That he purposely set up an inefficient, "Unconventional Book Tour" underscores the concept of the book.

So this will likely be my "over the holidays" read. What about you? Expecting a book for Christmas?

The comfort of discomfort

This is a repost from an article I wrote for Experience MHGS in October. The original can be found here. I wanted to keep a copy of the post on this blog as well:

Missouri is all I knew. I was born in Kansas City and raised in a Mellencamp-style small town. Janelle and I met as Southern Baptist summer missionaries, married right after college, started a family right away, and bought a house in a college town to live out our days rooting for the Tigers and volunteering in the church nursery.

We had talked about a potential move someday – maybe to the coast, or to Tolkein’s Rivendell. But that desire had been pushed to the background over the years, as babies and car payments and career ladders and mortgages became the norm. I had a stable government job, and everything in our life – including our lives themselves – were fully insured against loss. We had a retirement plan, college funds, and a Camry. We were set.

Then something happened. I think it was a combination of disenchantment with the comfort we worked so hard to create, and concern that – in our early 30s – we had made all the life decisions there were to make. The suburban life of routine (complete with its cocoon of safety) was the end of the line. We had won the race.

Unfortunately, it didn’t feel like a win. More importantly, we didn’t want the race to be over. We became uncomfortable with the comfort.

Janelle’s journey toward graduate school was the catalyst for change. MHGS had been on her radar for years, but more as a dream than a potential reality. As we re-entered the discussion of a potential move, we quickly got excited and terrified at the realities of actually moving 2,000 miles away from home. There were grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins, and friends to consider. Our financial comfort was based on a Midwest cost of living, not Seattle. We just bought a house. I worked in Missouri.

We dove into the process, figured out the logistics, and made the move. It wasn’t easy, but we had a ton of help along the way. The house sold almost immediately, even in a down market. I found a job where I work from home full time. Our cat slept 4 days straight during the drive from Missouri to Seattle.

Now, 5 months into our new life in Seattle and 5 weeks at MHGS, I can’t imagine any other life for our family. Discomfort is a regular part of each week.

It’s hard.

I love it.

What I learned at BrickCon 2010

I talk a good talk when it comes to "playing hard," but in reality I don't do it. I bury myself in responsibilities - some necessary, but many of my own creation - and rarely give myself the time to truly play. And when I do play, I struggle to separate from those To Do List items the little voice in my head tells me I should be getting To Done.

This weekend the kids and I attended BrickCon 2010, a convention for Lego enthusiasts. By enthusiasts I mean every level of interest, from casual to fanatic. I was amazed by the devotion of time, effort, and financial resources on these little plastic blocks. At the same time I was impressed with the creativity of the builders, and with how much fun everyone at the event was having. The smiles on the faces of the visitors, convention organizers, and exhibitors seemed authentic. The line outside the convention to get in as we were leaving was a testament to the value of fun.

Play was happening inside. Oversized displays of the White House, space ships, a grand piano, and gigantic insects lined the walls, complete with “Please Don’t Touch” signs as their only protection from curious fingers. The hall included Build-Your-Own areas packed with kids of all ages, sitting shoulder to shoulder, creating whatever they wanted and displaying it for all to see. When I asked my kids their favorite part, this was it. They got to make their own art and show it off with all the rest.

For a couple hours I felt it - the value of play, of taking a break from the real and self-developed concerns of life to immerse in creativity and fun, with fun itself as the end game. As often happens, though, once I got home I was quick to fall into worries again. (Insert your favorite expletive here)

The inspiration of BrickCon will stick with me, and over time I see a future where I can play as hard as I work, and value fun as much as my resume-building accomplishments. It has happened before, in small moments over the years, both as a kid and an adult. I’m optimistic that I can see play not as an escape from “real life,” but a vital ingredient of a life that is real.

I'm convinced I can find that place of rest, of fun. Adults with the maturity to act like children provide the inspiration. I look forward to BrickCon 2011, and between now and then plenty of imperfect steps along the way as I find ways to play.

And suddenly...

Everything there is to know about writing is taught in elementary school. When my son was in kindergarten last spring, he came home with this gem.

"If you get stuck when telling a story, just say, 'and suddenly...' Then something will pop in your head."

So certain. So wrong.

So I'm at Borders in the airport, and overheard a conversation between co-workers.

Hipsters 20s Dude: Look at this passage in this book. I can't believe it got through the editor. "...and then none of them was chosen for the position." It's ridiculous!

Bored co-worker Girl: Mmm-hmmm.

Dude: It's just crazy. Don't they read the book before they sell it?

Bored Girl: Hmmm.

Of course, Hipster Dude was incorrect, as the sentence is written correctly; to his credit, it does sound strange. (Thanks, 6th grade English class!)

What struck me that day is how often I am so certain about things and make a big deal about how ridiculous something is, without ever realizing that I'm wrong. So certainly wrong.

It gave me pause to chill out a bit before going off on my next rant.

(But don't worry, there will be plenty of certainly wrong rants to come, but at least I'll share them after a slight pause.)

One fine week in the Emerald City

The first week in Seattle has been fun, tiring, and awe-inspiring. Notes and quips from the first few days:

• 9 days in Seattle. 1 day of rain. No complaints, but a little surprised. Maybe Seattleites are whiners. Or maybe it's a conspiracy to keep Midwest hicks from moving to Seattle. Didn't work.
• 3 words: Top Pot Donuts. Wow.
• I may be colorblind, but I can see the green here. And the sunsets.
• In our neighborhood (Queen Anne - woot!), the streets are...well...cozy. Parking is allowed on both sides, which means every two-lane road acts as a one-lane road.
• The KC Royals just fired their manager. Again. I think it's about time to become a Mariners fan. The stadium looks great from the outside, and it's apparently a great place for a nap.
• I've never seen a Carnival-type cruise ship up close before. They are bigger than I ever imagined. And louder.
• I can walk 2 blocks to a non-Starbucks coffee shop. There are 7 Starbucks within a mile of our house.
• The "Seattle Chill" is a myth, at least from my experience so far. People have been as kind as any city I've been in.
• The music is great here, but FM radio is hit-and-miss due to the terrain. I still miss BXR
• Some things cost a little more (gas, local grocery store stuff), but I've been surprised that a lot of things don't (Pizza Hut, Sam's Club, K-Mart)
• On a clear day I can see the Olympic Mountains from my bedroom window.
• It sometimes feels like we're in Europe. We have an "English garden" in the back yard, everyone is walking and biking through the city, and there is water everywhere.

It's a beautiful place.

Never mix up your right foot with your left.

I was born in Kansas City, raised in small town Missouri, and graduated from Mizzou. My life is changing significantly this week, as we move from the known (Missouri) to the very-much unknown (Seattle, Washington). In the scurry and scatter of preparations, it's been tough to put the move in perspective, and even tougher to feel the feelings of the imminent changes for myself and my family.

During packing I ran across one of my all-time favorite books, and it seemed to help express back to me some of my own hopes, dreams, and fears as we start this new chapter in our life.

If you haven't read Oh the Places You'll Go! by Dr. Seuss, or not in awhile, I highly recommend it. Enjoy.




Congratulations!
Today is your day.
You're off to Great Places!
You're off and away!

You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes
You can steer yourself
any direction you choose.
You're on your own. And you know what you know.
And YOU are the guy who'll decide where to go.

You'll look up and down streets. Look 'em over with care.
About some you will say, "I don't choose to go there."
With your head full of brains and your shoes full of feet,
you're too smart to go down any not-so-good street.

And you may not find any
you'll want to go down.
In that case, of course,
you'll head straight out of town.

It's opener there
in the wide open air.

Out there things can happen
and frequently do
to people as brainy
and footsy as you.

And when things start to happen,
don't worry. Don't stew.
Just go right along.
You'll start happening too.

OH!
THE PLACES YOU'LL GO!

You'll be on your way up!
You'll be seeing great sights!
You'll join the high fliers
who soar to high heights.

You won't lag behind, because you'll have the speed.
You'll pass the whole gang and you'll soon take the lead.
Wherever you fly, you'll be the best of the best.
Wherever you go, you will top all the rest.

Except when you don' t
Because, sometimes, you won't.

I'm sorry to say so
but, sadly, it's true
but Bang-ups
and Hang-ups
can happen to you.

You can get all hung up
in a prickle-ly perch.
And your gang will fly on.
You'll be left in a Lurch.

You'll come down from the Lurch
with an unpleasant bump.
And the chances are, then,
that you'll be in a Slump.

And when you're in a Slump,
you're not in for much fun.
Un-slumping yourself
is not easily done.

You will come to a place where the streets are not marked.
Some windows are lighted. But mostly they're darked.
A place you could sprain both you elbow and chin!
Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in?
How much can you lose? How much can you win?

And IF you go in, should you turn left or right...
or right-and-three-quarters? Or, maybe, not quite?
Or go around back and sneak in from behind?
Simple it's not, I'm afraid you will find,
for a mind-maker-upper to make up his mind.

You can get so confused
that you'll start in to race
down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace
and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space,
headed, I fear, toward a most useless place.
The Waiting Place...

...for people just waiting.
Waiting for a train to go
or a bus to come, or a plane to go
or the mail to come, or the rain to go
or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow
or waiting around for a Yes or a No
or waiting for their hair to grow.
Everyone is just waiting.

Waiting for the fish to bite
or waiting for wind to fly a kite
or waiting around for Friday night
or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake
or a pot to boil, or a Better Break
or a sting of pearls, or a pair of pants
or a wig with curls, or Another Chance.
Everyone is just waiting.

NO!
That's not for you!

Somehow you'll escape
all that waiting and staying.
You'll find the bright places
where Boom Bands are playing.

With banner flip-flapping,
once more you'll ride high!
Ready for anything under the sky.
Ready because you're that kind of a guy!

Oh, the places you'll go! There is fun to be done!
There are points to be scored. there are games to be won.
And the magical things you can do with that ball
will make you the winning-est winner of all.
Fame! You'll be famous as famous can be,
with the whole wide world watching you win on TV.

Except when they don't.
Because, sometimes, they won't.

I'm afraid that some times
you'll play lonely games too.
Games you can't win
'cause you'll play against you.

All Alone!
Whether you like it or not,
Alone will be something
you'll be quite a lot.

And when you're alone, there's a very good chance
you'll meet things that scare you right out of your pants.
There are some, down the road between hither and yon,
that can scare you so much you won't want to go on.

But on you will go
though the weather be foul
On you will go
though your enemies prowl
On you will go
though the Hakken-Kraks howl
Onward up many
a frightening creek,
though your arms may get sore
and your sneakers may leak.

On and on you will hike
and I know you'll hike far
and face up to your problems
whatever they are.

You'll get mixed up, of course,
as you already know.
You'll get mixed up
with many strange birds as you go.
So be sure when you step.
Step with care and great tact
and remember that Life's
a Great Balancing Act.
Just never forget to be dexterous and deft.
And never mix up your right foot with your left.

And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and 3 / 4 percent guaranteed.)

KID, YOU'LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!

So...
be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray
or Mordecai Ali Van Allen O'Shea,
you're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So...get on your way!

--Dr. Seuss

Saving "Secular Washington"

On a recent business trip, I ran across this church flyer in a hotel in Washington, D.C. The vision statement has bothered me every since. Their vision is to "...make an impact on secular Washington..."

How do they define secular Washington?

• People not at McLean Bible Church?
• People not in church?
• People who drink, smoke, chew, or go with girls who do?

What about Muslims, Buddhists, Catholics, or Methodists -- Secular?

I'm confident the good people at McLean Bible Church have intentions to make a positive difference in their community, but the separation of what is "secular" and what is "non-secular" (spiritual, holy, Godly, churchy, non-loud, non-pierced?) confuses me. Why make the distinction?

Opening Day

I was born in Kansas City, and my parents lived in the shadow of Royals Stadium in the mid-1970s. They would get the $1 tickets in the upper deck, and I would karate-kick Mom's uterus as the crowd roared.

For those unfamiliar, at one time there were things to roar about at Royals games. The Royals and Yankees (and Blue Jays and Angels) played big games every year. George Brett won batting titles, chewed tobacco, and used excess pine tar on his bat. Frank White and Bud Black (African-American and Anglo, respectively) were my entry into race relations.

And the Royals beat the St. Louis Cardinals in the 1985 World Series. I was 9 years old. I will never forget the final catch and watching the ticker-tape parade on TV the next day.

Twenty-five years later, the Royals will start another season. Their 25th since their World Championship, and their 25th since making the playoffs. There have been a teases over the years, but overall it's been a long time since there's been much to cheer about.

But.

It's Opening Day.

And Opening Day is different.

As of today the Kansas City Royals have just as much chance to win the 2010 World Series (mathematically speaking, of course) as any other team.

There is something about Opening Day that gets me excited every single year. I had a friend in school whose dad took him out of school every year for the Royals' home opener. The teachers didn't love it, I'm sure. I thought it was the best idea ever.

I haven't even followed the Royals this spring, and I can't name more than 6 players on the roster. But I'll find the game on TV or radio this week and root root root for the Royals.

I'll keep up with them through the first week of games, and they may even keep my attention through April. Then I'll become distracted by the NFL Draft, I'll hear of a 6-game losing streak, and I'll find other things to do.

Until Opening Day 2011.

Poetry by Weezer

There will come a day

When we transcend our pain

Until that day

Take it easy on yourself

There will come a day

When we can finally rest

Until that day

Take it easy on yourself

Love is the answer

Makes no difference what you have heard

Love is the answer

You have got to trust in the word

- Weezer

Ease

I read an ebook this week entitled, "What Matters Now." It's a collection of micro-essays (200 words) from a variety of authors: Seth Godin, Dave Ramsey, Tom Peters, Tim Sanders, and many others with whom I wasn't familiar.

I recommend it (it's a free download from Seth Godin's blog), but one essay grabbed my attention and has yet to let go.

EASE

by Elizabeth Gilbert

We are the strivingest people who have ever lived. We are ambitious, time-starved, competitive, distracted. We move at full velocity, yet constantly fear we are not doing enough. Though we live longer than any humans before us, our lives feel shorter, restless, breathless...Dear ones, EASE UP.

Pump the brakes. Take a step back. Seriously. Take two steps back. Turn off all your electronics and surrender over all your aspirations and do absolutely nothing for a spell.

I know, I know – we all need to save the world. But trust me: The world will still need saving tomorrow. In the meantime, you’re going to have a stroke soon (or cause a stroke in somebody else) if you don’t calm the hell down.

So go take a walk. Or don’t. Consider actually exhaling. Find a body of water and float. Hit a tennis ball against a wall. Tell your colleagues that you’re off meditating (people take meditation seriously, so you’ll be absolved from guilt) and then actually, secretly, nap.

My radical suggestion? Cease participation, if only for one day this year – if only to make sure that we don’t lose forever the rare and vanishing human talent of appreciating ease.

...that's the book for me.

After 33+ years in church, hundreds of sermons, Sunday school classes, Jesus camps, and quiet times, I must confess I've not read every word in the Bible. It seems strange to me that I've claimed this book as a guide for life, yet I haven't read the darn thing.

That being said, my New Year's Resolution is not marking off "Bible Read Daily" this year. As a kid/teen/college student I tried the "read the Bible in a year" a number of times with little success. I never made it past the mid-February, Book of Numbers hump. I blame Pagiel son of Ochran.

What I am playing around with is changing my approach. Instead of looking to the Bible primarily for what it can do for me (though I believe it has plenty of utility for this purpose), I'm heading a different direction. Instead of scripture reading being a daily task, chore, homework, or check box, I want to enjoy the read. I want to experience the Good Book like it's a good book.

So I've picked up a chronologically-organized Bible in an attempt to read it the way I've read Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, or the DaVinci Code. Like a novel, with characters and plots and bad guys and morally grey good guys and kings and battles and special effects and whores and murderers and excessive alcohol use and peace and hope and love.

I'm a spurt reader, often putting in 6-8 hours into a book on a business trip, then leaving the book sitting near my bed at home for 6 weeks, unopened. I expect I'll read this one the

same way. Maybe I'll finish it in a few months. Maybe it'll take me longer than a year. Maybe I won't finish it at all. No matter.

My wife shared a blog post with me last week by Michael Spencer that was particularly helpful, and I'd recommend reading the entire article here. In it, he captures some of what I'm wrestling with.

Changing how I think about the Bible has been the most significant thing in my own experience with Jesus. In my formative years, we carried Bibles and quoted the Bible, argued about the Bible and used the Bible to prove we were right...

It’s not a dictionary, or an encyclopedia, or a manual of how to do or fix things. It’s God’s story, and our story, and God’s story again. It’s a story you believe and join. It’s not a chart of the future or the past. It’s the truth of life. It’s deep, but not like engineering schematics are deep. It’s deep like the best novels or the best poetry.

So that's where I'm headed -- to experience this story like a story. Wish me luck.

Favorites of 2009

Looking back at a few of my favorite things of the past year.

Favorite Snack Combo

Cinnamon Teddy Grahams + Almonds

I've been a fan of Teddy Grahams most of my life; I picked up almonds more recently. I randomly put them together (ala the old Reese's Peanut Butter Cup commercials with the cavemen combining chocolate and peanut butter) and experienced a heavenly snack.

Favorite Brothers

Tie: New Super Mario Bros. & The Avett Brothers

I didn't game much in 2009, but I've been loving the New Super Mario Bros. Wii game I received for Christmas. It also reminded me that I've been playing Super Mario Bros. games for nearly 25 years (yikes).

The Avett Brothers 2009 album, I and Love and You, is just good. Go listen to it. My favorite line so far: "Decide what to be and go be it."

Favorite Album:

DMB - Big Whiskey and the Groogrux King

2009 was a resurgence for my purchasing of music, partially due to the Amazon MP3 store and a great group of albums this year. U2, Brandi Carlisle, Weezer, and Jay-Z all had great 2009 albums. I'm defining favorite as "what stayed in our car's CD player the most this year." Dave Matthews won hands down.

Favorite New TV Show

Flash Forward

With all due to respect to Glee and V, I've enjoyed Flash Forward the most of any new show on television. I'm a sucker for innovative story telling and time-shifting narrative. Flash Forward has both.

Favorite "New to Me" Food/Drink

3-way tie: Coffee, Hummus, Homemade Guacamole

I somehow made it through college and helping raise two babies without resorting to coffee. I'm not sure what I was afraid of. It's tasty.

Favorite Movie Experience

"UP" in 4 Recliners

I didn't really have a favorite movie this year, but Janelle and I watched "UP" with the Creach's this past summer at the AMC Mainstreet 6 Theater in Kansas City's Power & Light District. With a full menu, servers bringing food, and reclining seats (complete with vibration and in-seat speakers), it was awesome.

Favorite Book

The Power of Less by Leo Babauta

Do less. Get more done.

I also recommend the authors blog, Zen Habits.

Favorite Blog

The Art of Non-conformity by Chris Guillebeau

The author this blog is a life-hacker of sorts (some similarities to Tim Ferris, author of The Four-Hour Workweek). He questions conventional wisdom, which I love. Also check out my review of his recent e-book, A Brief Guide to Early Domination.

For those who can't get enough of stuff Brian likes, see my Favorites of 2008 and A Few More Favorites from that year.